By Ed Roberts
Catholic Men of Delmarva
What does it mean to be a man in a world that often confuses strength with self-assertion and freedom with self-will? For the Catholic man, authentic masculinity begins not with power, image, or control, but with surrender to God. It is the courage to say with Joshua, “As for me and my house, we will serve the Lord” (Joshua 24:15), and then to live that promise in marriage, fatherhood, friendship, work, and parish life.
This vision will be at the heart of the inaugural conference of the Catholic Men of Delmarva, “Authentic Masculinity: A Call to Catholic Men,” scheduled for Oct. 3 at Saint Mark’s High School in the Diocese of Wilmington. The one-day retreat is expected to include Holy Mass with Bishop William E. Koenig, Eucharistic Adoration, reconciliation, fellowship, refreshments, and lunch. Speakers announced for the event include Father James Gebhart, Father Michael DeAscanis, Matthew Leonard, Gary Zimak, Father John Solomon, and Deacon Philip Belt, each addressing dimensions of Catholic manhood such as purity, trust, vocation and servant leadership.
Scripture never presents courage as mere toughness. Biblical courage is rooted in confidence that God acts first. Moses tells Israel, “Be strong and courageous. Do not fear or be in dread of them, for it is the Lord your God who goes with you” (Deuteronomy 31:6). Saint Paul tells the Corinthians, “Be watchful, stand firm in your faith, be courageous, be strong. Let all that you do be done in love” (1 Corinthians 16:13–14). These passages reveal the Catholic pattern: vigilance without anxiety, strength without domination, courage without pride, and action governed by love.
Saint Pope John Paul II repeatedly called men and women beyond fear and mediocrity. He urged believers, “Do not be afraid. Do not be satisfied with mediocrity. Put out into the deep,” and pleaded, “never, ever give up on hope, never doubt, never tire, and never become discouraged. Be not afraid.” He taught that “life is entrusted to man as a treasure which must not be squandered.” That is a demanding word for men: your life is not yours to waste. Your body, time, work, faith and relationships are gifts to be offered back to God.
Venerable Archbishop Fulton J. Sheen adds another searching test for Catholic men: “Love is not an emotion; it is an act of the will,” and “Nothing ever happens in the world that does not happen first inside human hearts.” His words remind men that courage begins in the hidden place where pride gives way to conversion. Pope Leo XIV has likewise urged Christians toward humble confidence, declaring, “God loves us, God loves you all, and evil will not prevail!” and emphasizing that Christ invites believers “not to respond to insolence with vengeance, but to remain faithful to the truth in love.” In that light, authentic masculinity is not harshness, but disciplined charity: strength placed at the service of truth, family, Church and the vulnerable.
Authentic masculinity is also profoundly Eucharistic and Marian, formed by kneeling before Christ before standing for truth. It receives mercy in confession before trying to lead others. It learns from Saint Joseph, who protected Mary and Jesus not through loud display but through obedience, labor, chastity and self-giving love. As one Catholic reflection on Saint Joseph notes, true Christian manhood is marked by “quiet strength, deep faith, and unwavering devotion to God and family.
Speaker Matthew Leonard’s own work gives this call a practical edge. In “Louder Than Words: The Art of Living as a Catholic,” his approach is summarized by the conviction that Catholics are called to sainthood and can become “huge, blinking neon signs that pointed to Jesus.” His “Art of Catholic” apostolate likewise frames the faith not as a hobby or opinion, but as “the art of living.” For Catholic men, that means holiness must become visible: in prayer that orders the day, discipline that trains desire, repentance that restores integrity, and charity that makes strength trustworthy.
Catholic man is therefore not called to perform masculinity but to be converted. He entrusts his fears to Christ when work is uncertain, his desires to grace when tempted, his family to prayer when life feels unstable, and his vocation to the Holy Spirit when sacrifice is required. Gary Zimak’s conference theme — “Let Go of Your Fear: Choosing to Trust in Jesus in Life’s Stormy Times” — captures the pattern of discipleship. A man becomes brave not because storms disappear, but because he discovers that Christ is already in the boat.
The Delmarva conference offers men an opportunity to recover this truth together. Men need brotherhood, worship, formation, and accountability. They need fathers walking with sons, husbands strengthening husbands, priests and deacons encouraging laymen, and all men learning again to hear the Lord say, “Rise, and have no fear” (Matthew 17:7). Authentic masculinity is not nostalgia, aggression, or self-reliance. It is the Catholic man, entrusted with life as a gift, standing before God with humility and saying: Lord, make me courageous enough to serve.
Ed Roberts is founder and president of the Catholic Men of Delmarva. The article was written with the help of artificial intelligence
